Mitch Albom does not want you to enjoy the NFL Draft

Someone always has to be a thrill kill. For us draft nerds, it is Mitch Albom of the Detroit Free Press.

You know Mitch Albom. He's been on The Sports Reporters for years. He's renowned as the nation's best sports columnist. He writes books I care not to read. He has really great hair.

He wants you to enjoy the NFL Draft less. He started today's column with:

I guess this is as good a time as any to say this: The NFL draft is out of control.

Not in a small way. In a bonzo, gonzo, head-exploding, what-is-wrong-with-you-people way.

Albom's argument is based on the speculative nature of the draft and the spectacle of the event being a waste of time.

Instead, he tells us (US!) to read a book or watch a hockey game.

Sorry Mitch, I think I'll pass on your books that are so sweet they give me a cavity. I'd rather read about a mammoth offensive tackle instead of books that appeal to the Oprah crowd.

I'll pass on a sport that decided to cripple itself with a strike lockout. Give me fatties running around in their undies. I'll pass on gloves-off brawling for a non-descript Conference-USA game in November.

Albom wants to know the "fascination with players who haven't done a thing?"

Rooting for your team to draft someone you think is good is hard to describe. Being happy for a college player from your alma mater is hard to describe.

Maybe, though, it's the same fascination Albom has with bobbing his head around and being smug when he talks. Maybe it's the same fascination Albom has with making terrible shill music.

Albom wants us to find better things to do. Maybe we can make things up and pass it off as work. Albom might appreciate it.